She Muses

Escaping Within

I‘ve been…kind of…coasting around for a bit. No real direction for the past month. I’ve been trying to figure out how to keep up with my current commitments. They are not many, although a few have fallen off the ledge. Time is an issue coupled with transportation. My commute time has tripled since the demise of my vehicle. I’m dealing with it.

I am determined to stick with my dancing. It makes me happy. Point blank and period. My dancing is suffering a bit due to the added stress but I will get used to it in no time. In the meantime, I just need to continue too work on dealing with these stressors. They’ve been winning lately. I’m in such a rut right now it’s ridiculous.

I’ve been utilizing music as a calming agent. There are a few stations that I frequent on Pandora. I have my Gotan Project station for Electronica and Tango, my Madeleine Peyroux for Blues and Jazz, and my Salsa station for my Salsa, Bachata, Cha Cha Cha, and Merengue. I listen to any one of these stations while I’m riding the Metro. They are the soundtrack to what I see. This makes me smile.

I also listen to these stations as well as my Classical Masters playlist during my meditation sessions. I light a candle. I press play. I sit and sway. Very calming and energizing at the same time. I feel ready to take on the world once I complete one of these sessions. Unfortunately, that doesn’t last me through the day. My thought process always finds a way to bring me back down. Annoying.

Enter in The Artist’s Way: A Spiritual Path To Higher Creativity by Julia Cameron. It’s just what it says. It claims to help remove any blocks that we as creative beings have which hinder us. We’re ALL creative. Every single one of us. This book will assist in the rebirth of that creative child living within. That’s what I hope anyway.

The book is a program meant to be worked over a 12 week period. I read the week one task last night titled Recovering a Sense of Safety. We all want to feel safe, right? Fear. The underlying culprit in a lot of unseen dreams and desires. Anyway, the book utilizes two tools that I have been practicing for years but haven’t been doing recently. The author calls them Morning Pages and Artist’s Dates.

Morning Pages is a form of journaling. One does what I call a brain dump in the morning shortly after waking. The book recommends three pages of this brain dump. It doesn’t even have to be organized or about anything in particular. Just what is on one’s mind at that particular point in time. I did my brain dump this morning with my candle lit, my music blaring and my coffee. Those three pages went by fairly quickly. Surprising since my normal journaling takes me a bit. I didn’t reread either. It recommends that I don’t until at least the 8 week mark. We’ll see how that goes.

The Artist’s Dates. Something for me and my artist child within. Any outing that makes me happy. My own playdate if you will. This can include a museum outing, a walk in a park, getting dizzy on a tire swing, a movie, a night of bowling, etc, etc, etc. It is just me on these dates. No one else is invited. These dates are tailored to bring my inner artist child to the forefront instead of keeping her in the background while I try to be the responsible adult. My inner artist child and the responsible adult can coexist. I’m sure of this.

It is recommended that the Morning Pages are done every morning and the Artist Dates are done at least once a week. Doable. Very. I’ll be putting my outings for myself on my calendar. I am a visual person after all.

I am hopeful that I can make it through the 12 week program. Historically, I don’t make it through things like this, or I do and just revert back to my old bad habits. Sick and tired of that. Here’s to making some serious changes and coming upon my breakthrough. Raises glass. Sips with a determined look in my eyes. Game on!

Thanks for reading guys!

*Images compliments of http://www.zona-musical.com/post128914-days0-orderasc-135.html & http://juliacameronlive.com*

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